Political Faces

Warren Harding swept to the 1920 Republican nomination largely because an Ohio promoter thought "He looked like a President." He won by an unprecedented landslide, 60% of the popular vote.

Are we still voting by appearances? Anything worth chattering about?

On the Democratic presidential ticket the first Black First Lady in-waiting, Michelle Obama (44) has guts and glamour, indisputable professional credentials, and is incredibly smart. There's an unflattering high school photo in her past and she chemically straightens her hair. And they put her in flats so her 5'11" frame doesn't tower over Jill Biden (57). But that's about it.

Dr. Biden, also a very handsome woman, appears to be aging without any knifestyling. Her skin is weathered from outdoor running and she dyes her hair. But that's about it. Yawn.

If they both weren't such fabulous examples of vibrant womanhood, it'd be almost boring.

Obama (47) himself is remarkable for being within the 35% of adult Americans who are at a healthy weight. His ears stick out and he has a gleaming smile. Cartoonists and dentists across the land are celebrating.

Now Joe Biden (64) is a different matter.

Back when the West was won, hair transplants looked like they were accomplished with a pop riveter - the so-called 'doll's hair' look. Until the late 1980s, the best method of hair transplantation involved 'plugs' that each contained 15 to 30 hairs.

Sen. Biden's early career foray into arms and hair control has become a little less obvious over time, thanks to revision with updated transplant techniques and greying hair. Nor was he alone: plugged-in along with him were the late senators William Proxmire and Strom Thurmond.

The right-leaning blogosphere is roundly condemning the Vice Presidential candidate's "poor judgment" for undergoing "expensive cosmetic surgery" and deems it indicative of a character flaw, akin to dishonesty (which already plagues Biden): "a blatant sign of vanity above substance."

Would they feel the same way if it came out that Obama's white sparklers were veneers? After all, the ivories are all capped in Hollywood. (And tinsel town has it's share of balding beaus battling back, too. Rob Schneider, Ben Affleck, Matthew McConaughey, Brendan Fraser, and Tom Hanks have all been rumored to have had hair transplants.)

But now for the Republican half of the ticket. Ladies first.

Cindy McCain (54) has had a little thing for stolen prescription opioids, but is more widely criticized for being "plastic." You'll never find a photo of her with crowsfeet or wrinkled brow. But is it deeper than too much bleach and Botox? Her ears show no obvious signs of a traditional cut-and-pull facelift, but her face is tight, the neck is remarkably taut, and her jaw is free of jowling....something you just don't find in nature. Her face work is as carefully done as Hillary Clinton's. This photo shows those pearls are real.

Pro-life, pro-gun, pro-drilling, abstinence-only creationist, the undeniably beautiful Sarah Palin (44) has received a lot of attention for producing her fifth child virtually undetected. Scott Sloan appears to have the only footage from February showing the Alaskan governor just 8 weeks before she delivered a 6 lbs, 2 oz baby.

Here is her daughter attending the RNC this week in St. Paul, at 5 months pregnant. The photo-op was deliberate, as both John McCain and Sarah Palin greeted the couple-to-be at the MSP airport.

Medically, the timing is curious. Bristol Palin (17) conceived as a 16-year-old junior. Was it in defiance of her parents' prior decision to yank her from her boyfriend's high school midyear and take her home for some eight months? Or was it to finish something she started? There is one menstrual cycle gap between the two pregnancies.

The real significance of this for the Elephant and the presidential contest is thoughtfully discussed here. I predict conservative Christian voters will love this fertile family fable, for the same reasons they voted to sit down and have a beer with recovering alcoholic GWB.

"First Dude" Todd Palin is a good 'ol boy with nothing knifestyle-worthy. At most, his elopement with the someday VP candidate coincided with the conception of his first born, Track (can't tell for sure since the Bristol and Track's birthdates have been scrubbed.)

Presidential nominee John McCain's (72) war injuries and torture have left him with limited range of motion in his arms. (According to fellow POW cellmate Colonel Bud Day, McCain had 3 fractures in his right arm, a fractured right knee, dislocated left arm, bayoneted left leg– before his captors starved him and hung him by his arms). That and a loose zipper seem to be his main contribution to today's subject.

To hear more, tune in to hear Anne explore it all with Kevyn Burger on FM107.1 at 10am Thursday.

Hair, Give Me a Head of Hair

Oh, let us count the 50 ways to lose your hair. There's androgenetic alopecia (pattern baldness), traction alopecia (evil minded hairdressers), telogen effluvium (physiological trauma like meds, chemo, stress, illness), and alopecia areata (an autoimmune disease) just to name the top ones.

Male and female pattern baldness is based on genetic background (thanks, Mom and Dad) and refers to progressive loss in predictable stages over predictable areas of the scalp. For men it can start in late puberty and peaks about age 40; for women the onset is at menopause. It accounts for about 95% of all pattern hair loss in both men and women. Mid-frontal hair loss increases with longevity; by age 80 over half of all women and 73% of men are affected. If you are wondering about the other stats, the average head of hair contains 100,000 hair follicles, while each follicle can sprout about 20 individual hairs. A healthy head of hair might lose 100 strands a day. Length comes 1.25cm a month.

There's a reason we associate bald-headed men with sexiness. In the primate world frontal balding conveys male status and maturity. A powerful sex hormone (DHT, the metabolite of testosterone) triggers the hair loss through folicular miniaturization and it takes a certain amount of confidence and bravado to just shave off what's left. Think Samuel Jackson, Patrick Stewart, Telly Savalas, Sean Connery, Steve McQueen, Yul Brynner, Vin Diesel, Ben Kingsley, Bruce Willis, Andre Agassi. Not a wimp among them.

Some clinical treatments for male pattern baldness exist, primarily finasteride (Rx Propecia) and topically applied monoxidil (OTC Rogaine). It works for most, but only if taken daily for eternity. The balding Olympic skeleton slider Zach Lund dropped his drawers and tested positive for fenasteride, netting a yearlong suspension and missing the 2006 games in Turin, Italy. In 2004 it had been added to the list of banned drugs in international sports because in tests it masks detection of cheater-drugs like the steroid nandrolone.

Hair replacement systems are widespread. Of course, there's always the wig, though we dignify it for men with a more elegant word: toupee (from the French toupet meaning hair tuft). These small wigs or hair pieces have been used since ancient times. The earliest known one was found in a tomb in Egypt circa 3200 BC. Julius Caesar wore one. True to form, only dead Hollywood men admit to wearing them: Frank Sinatra, Humphrey Bogart, George Burns, Bing Crosby, Bobby Darin, Fred MacMurray, Jimmy Stewart, John Wayne.

"I'm amazed by how often people ask me whether or not I wear a hairpiece, a wig, or a rug, as it is affectionately known."

And there are newer alternatives. Lord Xenu can't grow hair on his head, but a hairweave can approximate it for John Travolta. In 'netting' a thin, breathable net (similar to illusion tulle) is interwoven with the existing hair and supplemented with extensions. Even without the extreme closeup, his graying sideburns give it away. Other technologies include bonding, tracking, fusion, clip ons. Let's just say HairClub for Men has come a long way in the last 30 years.

Any number of female stars have experimented with these alternative methods for adding fullness and length to existing hair. Here's a whole webpage devoted to Paris Hilton's fake hair escapades! Sometimes, the look is less than successful, as displayed here on Britney Spear's head.

The permanent solutions involve cosmetic transplant of hair from one part of the scalp to another (here's a good journal article). The most up-to-date involves a surgical office procedure that harvest hair from the back or sides where it is thick and transplanting it in the thinning front regions. Using a local anesthetic, mini grafts of just a few or single follicles are used in place of the 'doll plug' punch grafts of yore. Four or more sessions, three months apart are usually required. Rob Schneider exhibited classic male pattern baldness pre-2005: hair receding from the lateral sides of his forehead and a thinning patch on the vertex (top). He's had some really nice hair transplant work. Less skillful is the work Ben Affleck has had done.

The unintended loss of one's locks is generally more disturbing for women than men. Sudden diffuse hair loss, telogen effluvium, is caused by an interruption in the normal hair growth cycle. A greater than normal number of hair folicles enter the rest stage (telogen) at all once, instead of in sequence. It takes another 3 months for the affected folicles to move into the growth state (anagen). It's at this point that the new hairs force out the old hairs and profuse shedding occurs. It has a myriad of traumatic causes: chemotherapy, childbirth, puberty, major surgery, chronic illness, severe emotional or physical stress. Usually the mechanism is a temporary disruption of hormonal balance.

Taking away a woman's hair can be a form of punishment. In ancient Greece it signified an enslaved woman. In France during WWII it marked collaboration with the Nazis. Even today it's used in US prisons. Then there are the women who chose to go bald. Sigourney Weaver may have been first with Alien 3. Demi Moore took it all off for G. I. Jane as did Natalie Portman for V for Vendetta. While praised for her unique voice and original songs, Sinead O'Connor is also noted for her expression of anger. When Britney Spears shaved her head, it triggered institutionalization in a treatment center.

Most Americans see a healthy bald woman and assume she’s a lesbian, radical feminist, political extremist or understudy for an alien role ala Star Trek. The sight of a woman’s bare scalp still makes society’s hair stand on end.

Beauty and sexuality remain tied to a woman’s hair. Natalie Portman said post V haircut: "It was kind of wonderful to throw vanity away for a bit."


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Hear Anne live on the Kevyn Burger show 10:00 to 11:00am Thursdays featuring Knifestyles of the Rich & Famous.